It’s not every day that a FedEx employee turns out to be the modern-day equivalent of Long John Silver, minus the parrot and, presumably, the peg leg. Yet here we are, delving into the curious case of Antwone Tate, a now-former FedEx worker from Memphis who, allegedly, figured that if he was going to move boxes all day, he might as well treat himself to some of the contents. Instead of parcels neatly arriving at their final destinations, Tate decided that his doorstep was a more fitting end point for these high-value treasures.
The saga unfurled when FedEx’s Loss Prevention team noted a curious trend of missing items that would perplex even Hercule Poirot. It all started on May 27, when certain precious packages seemed to disappear into thin air—or so it seemed until the “Aha!” moment struck, thanks to a fortunate sequence of investigation wizardry. Before long, a glittering breadcrumb trail led to a pawn shop, where an $8,500 diamond ring and nearly $14,000 worth of gold bars had astonishingly rematerialized. Tate, showing off his penchant for underestimating the watchful eyes of law enforcement, had graciously used his very own driver’s license for his pawning spree, as if to say, “Here I am, come get me!” And they did.
But Tate’s luxurious escapades didn’t stop at glittering jewels and shiny metals; no, he had a sophisticated taste for memorabilia as well. A third package, bursting with baseball nostalgia, vanished as well. This surreptitious theft included relics like a 1915 Cracker Jack Chief Bender card and a 1933 Goudey Sport Kings Ty Cobb card, valued collectively at about $6,800. To amateur collectors, these might sound like ancient portraits of long-forgotten athletes, but for card enthusiasts, it’s akin to unearthing ancient scrolls. Police intervention soon revealed these cardboard treasures being traded on eBay under the profile ‘antta_57,’ ensuring that everyone knew precisely how clever Tate wasn’t.
In a script that prints like the plot of an absurd heist movie, one might find themselves labeling Tate a magpie—drawn to all things shiny and collectible. Perhaps he felt disenfranchised, tired of the same old grind, and briefly lost himself in the seductive world of treasures that lay just beyond the tape of the packages he handled each day. However, it’s in these fantastical flights of folly that reality often comes knocking—this time in the form of authorities arriving to soundly escort him back to earth.
Tate has now found himself facing chargers for theft of property, and in a corporate tongue-lashing that shed all polite frontages, FedEx expressed their distaste for Tate’s creative re-imagination of the job description. The company hastily relieved the accused from his duties, highlighting in their statement that their job roles do not, in fact, condone or include making off with pique-worthy parcels. It turns out, “finder’s keepers” isn’t quite a part of FedEx’s employee manual after all.
In the aftermath of this curious sequence, there’s a cautionary takeaway for the rest of us legitimately tapping fingers, awaiting our next delivery update. Should your much-anticipated parcel go amiss, your instincts might tempt you to browse eBay, the digital coliseum where lost items seek new homes, often accompanied by tales best left untold. Just a friendly nudge, though: do exercise caution and avoid any listings tagged by suspiciously familiar handles like ‘antta_58’.
Ultimately, Tate’s odd journey—the stuff of whimsical legend or urban myth—serves as a reminder that while audacity might get you far, it’s prudent wisdom that ensures you don’t end up in handcuffs. And so, beneath the glimmer of gold bars and diamonds lies a universal truth: attempting to merge your un-sanctioned side hustle with criminal antics will eventually lead to anything but prosperity, with the only jewels left sitting upon your soul likely being regret and reflection.
